Sheen Sheen Sheen

After yet another booze-fueled weekend, Charlie Sheen, nee Carlos Estevez, has checked into rehab.  If anyone reading this is surprised, well, that’s just weird.  One of the lovely call girls who spent the evening with Sheen posted pictures of the alleged scene in his Sherman Oaks home.  Cocaine and booze and whores, oh my.  I have loved Sheen since his days as the bad boy cameo in Ferris Bueller and Rick “Wild Thing” Vaughn in the Major Leagues.  Picking up chicks, getting hammered and avoiding arrest are the hobbies of his most beloved characters.  The phrase says, “write what you know”.  Sheen has simply modified these words into “act what you know”.  And he has been making bank ever since.  Good show Sheen, you crack me up.

That said, it does bear mention that were Sheen a female, the perspective, including my own, would be very different.  What is boozily charming on a forty something man would be perceived as degenerate and unseemly in a woman.  I’m not here to preach about a double standard, especially in Hollywood.  It is what it is and hopefully it will change.

I have supported Sheen in all his stuporous adventures but now it’s affecting his work, and thus, many others at CBS.  Somehow, Two and a Half Men is the highest rated half hour sit-com in US television.  Yes, it’s true.  I couldn’t make that up.  As the shining star of this tasteful program, Sheen is the inexplicable, highest paid actor on television.  And to clarify, that’s all of television, not just half hour shows.  However, due to his current stint in rehab, Men is on indefinite hiatus.  When this happens to more ensemble-based shows, the character/actor in question can simply be written out temporarily.  This is not possible for Men.  I can barely stomach it with Sheen; I’m sure as hell not watching just one and the half men.  It’s very selfish to jeopardize the show and all the other people involved because you need four and not just two whores at a time.

As per usual, the character Sheen portrays is essentially a slight parody of himself: boozy, womanizing, philandering and saucy-tongued.  My advice to CBS is to somehow integrate this real-life combustion into Men itself.  Clearly the audience keeps tuning in for more of Charlie’s bawdy ways.  The show should get meta and make an in joke out of the whole situation.  Problem solved.  Sheen isn’t Lohan: one cheeky wink at the audience, and he is good to go.

What do you think about Sheen’s behavior?

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One Response to Sheen Sheen Sheen

  1. Janet Hubert-Whitten says:

    That would be awesome if CBS started working in Sheen’s real-life issues into the character on Men. Take it to a darker place – Charlie Harper must deal with his obvious addictions: women, booze (and throw in painkillers/depression pills).

    You make a good point about the double standard for women, but I think you will see that change over time with Paris and Lohan and their proteges continuing to be reckless drug addicts well into their thirties. Paris and Lohan are basically the Rosa Parkses of messy sluts.
    Unless they clean up their acts, but I don’t think Paris Hilton will ever stop because she is a machine.

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